Sharing Memories of Moriah

Today, for whatever reason, I was browsing through old Facebook messages. I came across a message from my friend Moriah. It was before a trip to Arizona for Thanksgiving. It said, "While you're there, hang out by some golf courses and find a hot golfer. Marry him, stay in the sun, and invite me to hang out by your pool." It made me laugh until I cried. I didn't meet a hot golfer, Moriah, but, 8 years later, I am moving there and I wish so much that I could invite you to lay out by my pool.

Moriah died 7 years ago this month. That's so hard to believe. She had so much life in her short 20 years and I still miss that light all the time. I think the hardest part about losing a best friend is that my relationship with Moriah was so isolated. With the losses of my grandfathers, I have always had other people around me that shared the same memories with them. We are able to tell stories together and bring them up all the time. With Moriah, that was never the case. The majority of the experiences I had with Moriah were just her and me. The two of us shopping together. The two of us studying together. The two of us having dinner. We were a duo and half of that duo was ripped away. I was never able to say "Remember when...?" because I'm left alone to carry all of those wonderful memories.

I think it's important to remember. Although the memories weren't shared at the time, I can share them now. I will always remember Moriah calling me. She didn't like texting. She felt more connected when she could talk aloud. She called me the day before she died and started the conversation with "Hey girl! I just wanted to hear your voice." I will always remember our "study sessions" that involved absolutely no studying, but a whole lot of gummy worms and gossip (usually about boys.) I will always remember how she insisted on eating at Selleck dining hall even though it was far for both us to walk because the had the BEST cheese pizza. I will remember whenever she was happy, she would ask me to go to the mall where she picked up and modeled every purse in Dillard's that neither of us could actually afford and we laughed and laughed. I will remember when she was sad and we'd leave all the lights off in her dorm room and just lay on the rug and talk and cry. I will remember that her favorite scary movie was Cry Wolf and we watched it at least 10 times. And how much she loved cats and holidays and swimming and, most of all, her family. Although I know it sounds silly, every time I hear Cardi B on the radio, I think of Moriah because she would haved LOVED Cardi B. With Moriah, I was always comfortable talking because we both talked a lot (even at the same time sometimes) and that was okay. I could always be myself.

I was lucky to have a friend like Moriah. Thanks for letting me share a little bit of her today.