Wedding Season is Here Again

This weekend started another spring season of wedding bliss. For me, this means dressing up, stuffing my face with cake, and sometimes dancing very badly. I can't believe it's almost been a year since Dani's and Ashley's weddings and I have four more this year. I was talking to a friend the other day who had only been invited to only one wedding in her life. I think being from a small town creates more wedding opportunities, plus I have a rather large family so I've been to quite a few. Here are some things I've learned:


1. Just because someone has a wedding registry does not mean they are easy to buy for. Sometimes a couple only wants things that are hundreds of dollars and buying anything else makes you seem cheap. Sometimes they put things like one mixing bowl or a laundry hamper on their registry, which you can assume they'll use but it makes for a pretty stupid present. Sometimes nothing they want is in the store you are at. A lot of the time, most of the registry items are for the bride and friends/family of the groom can't find a present that will really be appreciated by the one they want to appreciate it. But those who don't have a registry give no clues at all and this can be just as bad.

2. Every dance floor is different and it sometimes takes a while to understand the atmosphere. I've been to weddings where no one dances and, if you do, you feel 100 eyes staring at you and I've been to ones where there is no room on the dance floor and everyone is amazing dancers so you're not sure how to keep up. The rule here is just stop worrying about everyone else (except maybe the bride and groom) and enjoy yourself. I'm a terrible dancer, but the best wedding receptions I've been to have involved me making a fool of myself.

3. Wedding attire is tough unless you are part of the wedding and the dress is chosen for you. I love dresses but one dress does not cover all weddings. Some are black tie affairs and others very casual. Finding common ground it difficult. I tend to believe going on the dressy side is safer, but less comfortable usually. The one thing I always say is have shoes easy to slip off or comfortable. It's usually a long night.

4. Someone is going to cry. Every wedding I've ever been to involved tears at some point or another. I am a huge crier, but not a wedding crier. Why is this so emotional? Be happy and celebrate!

5. I hate bouquet tosses. Everyone points out I'm single, makes me walk in front of everyone and pretend I'm dying to carry around some flowers for the rest of the night. I don't want to get married anytime soon. I don't need flowers. Give it to the pretty little girls in dresses. That makes for the best show.

6. You can tell a lot about a couple by their wedding ceremony. These services vary greatly. Some are lengthy and some very short. Music is a big part of some and nonexistent in others. Couples that write their own vows are different than ones you can only whisper an "I do." When two people are nervous in front of a crowd, they often show their true colors too. Watch their faces and how they look at each other. It's often the sweetest part of a wedding.

7. Wedding food is the bomb. I am so excited to keep eating. Haha.


P.S. Congratulations to my Uncle Steve and new aunt Diana on their wedding this past weekend.

No, I Can Not Come to My Phone Right Now.

If you have ever urgently needed to get ahold of me, you have probably been frustrated. I won't text you back right away. Answering a call? 50/50 at best. My friends and family are always harping on me because I am difficult to contact. I understand this agitation; I really do. But I'm not apologetic about it either. Sometimes, I need a phone detox. When I get home, I often set my phone on the charger, on vibrate or silent, and leave it for hours. It isn't because I want to be left alone exactly. It is because just the presence of that phone in my hand or pocket or purse is pulling me away from the world in front of me. What is it about a cell phone that is so magnetic?

I see this with my students all the time. I'm not going to whine about students and their phones in school. Honestly, I utilize the phones for pop quizzes whenever I can. What I am most concerned about isn't the fact that they are not listening to me or not following my cell phone rules (although that totally frustrates me). I am most concerned about the anguish in their faces when they want to reach down in their bag, but I'm standing beside them. And the time a boy chewed his nails raw when I took his phone away for one 50-minute period. I am concerned that we don't know how to function alone or offline. This is why texting and driving is such an epidemic. I fall prey to it too. Today, I had to throw my phone in the back seat of my car just so I would stop lighting up the screen every few minutes as I drove.

So, if I don't get back to you about your funny text until tomorrow, it's not because I am ignoring you, upset, or angry. I just can't come to the phone right now.

I Need A New Hobby

A few weeks ago, after talking about how stressed I have been in my student teaching experience, one of my professors asked, what do you do in your free time? My immediate responses were reading, watching movies, and writing. She paused for a few moments and then asked, "Can you see that your hobbies are deeply connected to your practice?" 

I was taken aback and tried to argue. "No, I don't read stuff for school. Mostly fiction. And the writing isn't for work either. It's my own writing."

She didn't really push the issue, but mentioned later in the conversation that I needed to find ways to escape work and stop working my mind so hard. This is a really difficult concept for me. My mind is almost always on full speed. Thinking, thinking, and more thinking. And I love thinking, especially about new stories that I read, watch, or write. But am I overworking my mind? When I think back to my response, reading and writing don't sound like such wonderful hobbies. A co-worker asked me what I did this weekend once and I realized I had just watched movies, planned lessons, read a book, and planned more lessons. After they had all been talking about training for marathons, painting, and ice skating, I didn't even want to say that out loud. 

So what should be my hobby? I'm not opposed to finding a new hobby. I'm just not sure how to go about doing it. Working out is the first thing that comes to mind, but trust me when I say that I think more on a bike or treadmill than almost anywhere else because I don't have anything else to occupy my mind. Something like volleyball is different because it forces you to think only about the game at hand. This is something I want to continue to consider. If anyone has any fabulous ideas, let me know!