Go Where the Wind Takes You...Or Make the Jump?

I am a control freak. I like to be in charge of my own life and make my own decisions. Maybe it's an oldest child side effect or maybe it's an inherited trait from my father. Possibly, it's because of how I was raised or due to the fact that I've never been a relationship that forced me to pull back. Regardless, I naturally don't like to wait around for things to happen. I like to make them happen.

But, for the past 5 years or so, I have made a very conscious effort to "go with the flow." I found out in college that many of my best moments weren't planned ahead of time, but happened when I just went wherever the day/night took me. I try to release the reigns whenever possible and say "yes" to opportunities that come along. As a general rule, although uncomfortable to me at times, this has served me very well. I have met amazing people, tried new things, and learned a lot about myself from taking chances and experiencing whatever has come my way.

The problem is, sometimes I struggle to find the line between riding and driving. If I just keep riding the waves of my life, things may never change. I might stay at my same job in my same town doing the same things forever. I may do what everyone else wants me to do and not do what I envision for myself. But jumping into the driver's seat has caused me to make bad decisions (and purchases) many times too. For example...

*If I hadn't made a bold decision, I wouldn't be going to Italy this summer.
*If I hadn't made a bold decision, I wouldn't be getting Master's degree.
*If I hadn't made the bold decision to walk into a stranger's dorm room on a lonely night, I would never have made one of my best friends.

*If I had made a bold decision to leave my job after a stressful first year like I wanted, I wouldn't be doing the job I love now.
*If I had made the bold decision to go meet people I just met on dating apps, I most definitely would have put myself in awkward situations instead of realizing they were creeps through text message at a safe distance away.
*If I had made the bold decision to say "no" to three jobs, I probably wouldn't be able to afford that trip or that degree.

See that crazy line? So, you can go with the flow or you can make the jump.  Either way, you might not get what you want. Either way, amazing things might happen.