That Lightbulb Moment When I Finally Realize What Is Really, Really Important to Me

So, last night I presented my capstone presentation for graduation and I was sooo emotional. Even after I was finished presenting I felt like I was shaking. I kept hugging all my cohort friends and professors and cooperating teachers. I cried. Even hours after the whole ordeal, I sat in bed and couldn't sleep. I kept thinking it must be because I was nervous about moving on to the "real world" or that I was sad to say goodbye to those friends I had seen in almost every class for two years. I finally calmed down and slept a few hours, taught another day of school, and attended another day of watching capstone presentations. And as I was sitting there among friends and celebrating our success and progress, it hit me hard:

I Don't Want to Leave.

I don't mean that I don't want to graduate because I am definitely ready for that. But upon my high school graduation I couldn't wait to get out and do something new and meet new people. I felt chained down and wanted to be free. I just assumed that another graduation meant another transition to a new place with new people again. But this time around I don't feel chained at all. In fact, I feel supported. I have a community of all different kinds of people in Lincoln that lift me up in all different ways. Moving, instead of freeing me, would feel like falling. Here, I can continue to go enjoy the Haymarket with friends. Here, I can visit campus and still go to Husker football games. Here, I can work much more closely to the teachers and peers I respect and love to work with. Here, in Lincoln, is my home.

So...I don't think I'm leaving. I don't have to. Maybe I can get hired in a nearby school like Seward or Waverly. Maybe Lincoln Public Schools will realize what they're missing and actually call me for an interview somewhere ;) If absolutely nothing else, I can definitely get a sub certificate and take a year to figure out my life. I'm going to be okay. In this moment, I feel so little stress. And it feels so good.

The Customer Isn't Always Right

Although, as I have stated in past blogs, I think there are a lot of wonderful things going on in the world right now and some very generous people out there, I have encountered some very rude people  recently too. I have heard a lot that we are becoming more callous because of our interactions online. When we aren't face-to-face with the person we are insulting, we can't see the impact we have and feel more entitled. While I agree with this and see the most atrocious personal attacks in Youtube comments on a daily basis, I also find that people don't care about being rude straight to someone's face. Yesterday, I saw an older man at Dairy Queen chew out a waitress because the restaurant changed the menu. A few weeks ago, I heard a young man on the street screaming into his phone about a parking ticket (while standing by his car-clearly parked illegally). I've heard women at lunch whispering cruel things about their co-workers' appearances. 

This isn't a generational issue. It's a egocentric issue. Why do we feel so entitled? Why are our feeling more important than the feelings of others? As author Brené Brown said in her book Daring Greatly, “Everyone wants to know why customer service has gone to hell in a handbasket. I want to know why customer behavior has gone to hell in a handbasket.” Consider other perspectives. Listen to the reactions of the people you're yelling at. It's ok to share your opinions and feelings, but don't do it at the expense of someone else.